It's the story...

So, once upon a time, my life was kind of the TV Guide. (Speaking of which, I miss the TV Guide. I loved getting it, and devouring it, and I have every Jeff Jarvis review, I think, possibly ever.) My life, at one time, was made up of television, and movies, and music, and books. I had no idea that this would ever end.

And then I met this boy named Nicholas, and first of all, I had to start watching all of this stuff that he watches. Which I happily did for about six months. And then I got tremendously bored. He has never met a police procedural show that he didn't like.

TiVo was the best thing that ever happened to our relationship.

And then along came this tiny child we called Betsy. And she zapped all of my energy right out of me, and took my mind right along with her. I could not watch hour long shows anymore, because I just genuinely could not follow the plot anymore. It was too confusing, and so I had to just give up on almost everything that I watched except the news.

This continued all through the birth and nursing of Felicity as well. And then, when Felicity turned 3, it was kind of like I emerged from a haze and my brain at least semi-functioned again.

So this year I am again watching television. Movies are still really rare unless they are on DVD (and even then, probably have been out for at least a year). It's fun to be able to follow a plot from week to week again.

I am, however, busier than I was when I had literally no one but myself to entertain all day long. So I can't watch everything, and I have to draw a line somewhere. My line is at reality television. I will cop to watching Teen Mom, but other than that I haven't watched any reality tv since at least 2006. I wish that I could just watch the people singing on some of those shows, without the judging and all. I really do love the Lawerence Welk show, and really, they could be the same thing without the snarky judges.

As far as my television viewing for the this year, here is what I watch:

Parenthood, Smash, Once Upon a Time, Nashville, Vegas, Dallas, Bunheads, How I Met Your Mother, 2 Broke Girls, Mike and Molly, The Big Bang Theory, The New Girl, The Mindy Project, Glee, Parks and Recreation, Modern Family, Frontline, Washington Week, Meet the Press, 60 Minutes, and Melissa and Joey. And Saturday Night Live, which I never stopped watching.

I also watch the PBS Newhour religiously, and I watch the parts of the Today show that interest me. And (yes, Joy, be honest) I watch Days of Our Lives and General Hospital every day, and the Young and the Restless and the Bold and the Beautiful a lot of days. (But I TiVo them! I don't let the girls see them!)

I also have spent my weekend trying to catch up on Downton Abbey, which I know is the hot new thing. I am really enjoying it. The production values remind me of my dear beloved Avonlea and Wind at My Back.

I wish that I had time for Elementary, which I have heard is very good. And I wish that we had HBO and Showtime, but at the moment it isn't in the budget. Of course, if we did, I might never get anything done.

An ADVENTure in time...

Well, Christmas has come and gone. Christmas is always my favorite time of year, not the least because it is also my birthday. I honestly have no other day to look really forward to, at least as far as getting attention and, to be honest, gifts. So perhaps that is why I kind of over do the advent calendars.

We have 5 advent calendars. I so highly recommend having at least some way to count down the days until Christmas with your children. One of my friends told me that she wraps up 25 books and lets her kids open one per day. Such a cool idea.

Our first advent calendar is a Winnie-the-Pooh calendar that is velcro, so you stick up the ornament/gift/Pooh character every day.

The second is a house that has doors to open. This is my favorite, because it is the most like the advent calendar that I had growing up. I got it from Chinaberry, which I recommend if you are looking for advent calendars because they have a nice selection.

The third also came from Chinaberry. It is called "The Story of Christmas," and every day you take our a small booklet and read a part of the Christmas story. Each booklet has a golden string attached, and so one year after Christmas I bought a very tiny tree that we hang the books on after we read them.

The fourth advent calendar I made at MOPs. Yes, you read that right, I made it. It is made of a cookie sheet, painted white with a grid drawn on it. Then (this was the difficult part) I made a different little magnet for each day. There are ones with buttons, with snowmen, with gifts, with ornaments. There is a picture of Betsy and of Felicity. I love it because I know how hard it was to make!

And then there is the girls favorite. It is on the computer, and a friend of ours sends it to us in an email every year. It is created by Jacquie Lawson, and I highly recommend it. The girls look so forward to seeing what will happen every day. And sometimes you get to create things (like a stocking or a snowflake) and that is their favorite part.

We also have an advent wreath. It is so easy to make your own. You simply make or buy a plain green wreath, and then place four small candle holders around the inside, and a large candle holder in the middle. For the middle use a large white candle, and then you can buy the 3 purple and 1 pink candles all together at Hobby Lobby.

Every Sunday night, we gather around the advent wreath. I have a book that I love called Just 25 Days Til Christmas by Rebecca Hayford Bauer that has the Bible readings for each candle. Then I teach the girls what each candle means (the purple represent hope, faith, and peace, the pink joy, and the white love). Then we put out the corresponding part of the manger scene (we have a manger scene that we just use for this purpose, one that isn't going to be damaged by small hands touching it). The hope candle is the first, and that is when we put out the stable. Faith is for Mary and Joseph, Peace is the angels, Joy is the shephards. When we light the Christ Candle (the white one) on Christmas Eve we put the baby Jesus in. Then, starting on December 26, the wise men begin their journey. They start at the front door and go all around the house until they get to the stable on January 6, which is Epiphany.

I know that I have already done a blog about our Epiphany celebration, so I won't go into all that again. But I wanted to share this, as I think that it is a really easy way to incorporate the story of Jesus' birth into your Christmas celebration, and in a tactile way that your kids can remember.

I recommend another advent book also, which has a lot of cool ideas of ways to teach kids by using their hands about the customs of Christmas and how they intersect with the story of Jesus' birth and that is The ADVENTure of Christmas by Lisa Whelchel.

We also have an elf on the shelf, which my children love so much that they honestly cry when he leaves on Christmas day. His name is Darren, and they look so forward to finding him every day. Our elf is not very adventerous, and so he just moves around from shelf to shelf. I have a feeling that Darren will stick around even long after the idea of Santa has passed them by, that is how much they love finding him every day.

Each day of the advent season is special in our house. There is so much to do in December! And every morning I read from the 25 Days til Chirstmas book during breakfast. I cannot recommend this book highly enough. I read it as a child and I still learn from it every year. Then at night before bed I read from Advent Storybook by Antonie Schneider. (Not a great title, but it's a great book!) It tells the story of Benjamin Bear, who is on his way to Bethlehem and all of the different people and animals he meets along the way.

You can imagine (if you know me at all) we have tons of Christmas books and movies, and while I admit I do try to squeeze them all in, this year I loosened up and we actually got more watched and read than when I harp and push about it. I had a fabulous advent season this year, a wonderful Christmas and birthday, and I honestly am looking forward to the new year. I hope that you can say the same, and I wish you peace and joy next year and beyond.

No answers to why?

What do I want to say? I want to say many, many things, and say them eloquently, and make you think and reevaluate and maybe even change your mind. But I'm not going to do that.

I have purposefully avoided looking at my facebook page today. It's not that I don't care about your opinion. I value your opinion, even if it is totally different than mine. I want to know what you think and why you think that way.

But...not today. Maybe it is too raw. Too close to home. Maybe I have way too many thoughts jumbling through my head and I can't add any more. Maybe I already knew how you would feel, maybe I already knew that you would be heartbroken and sad and wanting to lash out. And that's all that it is, really. Some people want to blame guns, or gun control, or the media, or the lack of prayers in schools, or Congress, or whatever. I do some of those things (maybe all of those things) too. And I also know that it is so much more than just that-if it were one thing, this wouldn't keep happening. It is everything and nothing all at the same time, at least to me.

I read a book a couple of years ago about Columbine by Dave Cullen. It was one of the most fascinating books I have ever read. Basically, for me, anyway, everything that I thought that I knew about Columbine wasn't true. And everything that was true took this man 10 years to uncover. And I often wonder what the result of all of that misinformation about Columbine has lead to? If more people knew that that was not a school shooting born of ridicule and loneliness? If more people knew that one shooter was a true psychopath and the other an easily led, depressed boy? Would it somehow change the way that some of these other people, following in their path, have viewed a challenge to...I don't know, to their feelings of ridicule and loneliness.

I don't think that any rational person ever has shot at tons of people, much less children. I don't think that people at their heart, in their right mind, mean to hurt people. I think that, in all honesty, most people, maybe even all people, just want to love their families and have a place to live and food on their table. And that everything else is gravy. I believe that to be true of all people, everywhere on earth.

Please keep in mind that I am not speaking at all about the grief and loss and horror that the parents and friends and loved ones of those killed must be going through. I can't begin to know the deepth of their loss and I realize that.

But at this time of year, when I am contemplating the birth of my Savior, I truly believe that he came to give us peace. An everlasting peace that can and will exist in us all. "In Me you may have peace. In the world you will have hard things happen to you; but be of good cheer, I have conquered the world." John 16:33

A rose is a rose is a rose...

Names facinate me. They always have. For my 15th birthday I had a cake decorated with nothing but names.

I originally named my children when I was seven. They were Ginger, Adam, Crystal, and Jason. Of those names, the only one that I might still ever use is Ginger, and that would most likely be for a dog.

When I was about 13, I named my children again (and this time I made them all girls). They were Bradleigh Elizabeth, Anastasia Rebecca, Jessica Kate, and Tyme Aryn. And I really, truly intended to use these names. Right up until I turned about 20 and decided that I wanted my kids to have old names, names that had a lot of meaning to me.

Betsy's full name is Elizabeth Anne Watson Johnson. The Elizabeth comes from my grandma, who was Margaret Elizabeth. I, in turn, am Joy Elizabeth. And since my grandma meant more to me than just about anyone on earth, Betsy is Elizabeth in her honor. And then, she's Betsy because I just love the name Betsy. It is such a cute name. We are currently reading the Betsy-Tacy series and that is Betsy. Her name suits her to a tee. Anne is for Anne Shirley, otherwise known as Anne of Green Gables. Anne is my favorite literary character of all time. She is my best friend, really. And then Watson is my maiden name. It was hugely important to me that I get that in there. I hadn't anticipated that until I was pregnant. But I didn't want to hyphenate it because I always hated being at the end of the alphabet. Truly, I was thrilled when I met Nick that my kids would be in the middle of the alphabet. So, it's there but it's just a second middle name. What she does with all these names when and if she marries is her problem to deal with.

Felicity is Felicity Kate Watson Johnson. Felicity is from a different book by L.M. Montgomery called The Story Girl. And she figured heavily into the show Road to Avonlea. Kate is from my great-grandmother, who was my Grandma West's mother. Her name was Jessie Kate but she went by Kate. Ergo that Jessica Kate up there in that other list. It was close, I could have gone with Jessica. But I knew that people of a certain age would think of Sweet Valley High if I named them Elizabeth and Jessica. And I love the name Felicity. And then of course, she is stuck with the Watson too.

If I had a boy, he would have been Benjamin David Robert Johnson. The Benjamin because I like it (and I think that the 'j' in the middle goes well with Johnson). And David and Robert for my dad and my father-in-law. But that wasn't to be.

And lastly there are the dogs. Gidget and Moondoggie. It is shocking to me how many people just think that we gave Moondoggie a weird name. Moondoggie is Gidget's boyfriend, both in the movies and on the TV show. Their middle names are Catherine and Heathcliff, my original choices for their names, which Nicholas vetoed.

The circle of life...

One of my MOPs friends just posted that she is wondering how to talk to her children about death. So it has inspired a blog post.

My girls are very inquesitive about death. Betsy has lived through a dog dying, and my Grandma's death, so for a while she just kind of naturally had a lot of questions. Felicity hasn't really experienced death, but she thinks about it a lot. She often says to me, "Mommy, I don't want to die." And I just try to talk to her about the fact that everyone dies at some point, and then, because we are Christians, we talk about Jesus and the fact that he died for us and what that means.

I have some books that I really enjoy on this subject. Please note that they are not all Christian in theme. In my life, I am more than willing to read someone else's point of view on things, and then I always remind the girls what I believe. I want them to always understand that we can hold onto our beliefs, and still learn from other people who are questioning, or who have found a different answer.

My favorite of these books is Badger's Parting Gifts by Susan Varley. In it, Badger dies and the animals all get together and remember all of the things that Badger taught them during his life. When my grandmother died, this was my go to book for Betsy and we would talk about all of the things that Grandma loved, all of the things that she had shown us, all of the things that she had pressed on our hearts.

What's Heaven? by Maria Shriver is a book talking about what heaven may be like. I like to use this as a starting point for a conversation about what I think heaven is like, and ask the girls what they think heaven is like. This is not an explicitly Christian book.

The Tenth Good Thing About Barney by Judith Viorst is another very good book that is quite secular in nature. The child in this book questions the idea of heaven and God and he doesn't really get answers. That said, it is an excellent book about dealing with the crummy emotions that come with the death of a loved one.

Kadish for Grandpa In Jesus' Name Amen by Catherine Stock is a combination of Jewish and Christian beliefs about death. It is a very good book for understanding that the two cultures do different things when someone dies, but that ultimately they are both about remembering and loving the person.

And finally, When a Pet Dies by Fred Rogers is an excellent resource for that specific loss. Mr. Rogers is gentle in his explaination of the loss of a pet and about the idea that someday you may be ready to get another pet.

Talking in our house is prized above nearly all else. I encourage questions, even if I don't really know that answers, and I flat out say if that is the case. We read our Bibles every day, so my kids definately have an understanding of Jesus and our values. But I let them know that we will still grieve and hurt just like everyone else. I hope that they grow to understand death as a part of life, not to be feared, but to be anticipated as a continuation of the journey.

The Garden of Eden (aka Rix Mills)...

So, just now I was outside calling my dog and I was listening to many things. The lambs, the birds, the rooster. Plus, I was enjoying my own light show with the fireflies, or, as we in southeastern Ohio call them, lightning bugs.

It is quite unbelievable to me that there are people who don't open their backdoor to these sights and sounds.

Rix Mills is in my bones, in my blood. I love Rix Mills like it's a living, breathing person. I have no idea how far back in my family Rix Mills goes. My great-grandmother, Kate Tom, grew up in Rix Mills, and I have no idea how much further back it goes.

I utterly cannot imagine living anywhere else. It is the most beautiful place on earth to me, and to many others who have shared with me how much they love the view from Terra Cotta Vineyards, which is just up the road.

My kids live in the world that I grew up in. They smell the honeysuckle every spring, they watch the lambs nursing in the backyard, they feel the wind blow through like a tornado in the fall. They attend the Rix Mills Presbyterian Church every Sunday, just like I did, and my mom, and her mom, and on and on. They play outside with the Baughman kids, just as my sister and I played with those same Baughman kids' dads.

I'm sure that to many (perhaps to most) Rix Mills is too remote, too far out. I understand that best in the winter, when our road is like a sled ride to town. But even then, I would never want to wake up anywhere else. I have always wanted to live in the very house that I live in, for as absolutely as long as I can remember.

Rix Mills Remembered by Paul Patton, and featuring his wonderful paintings, is a wonderful book about the history of Rix Mills that I highly recommend. You can even read it at the library, as they have it in the reference department. My grandmother is the piano player in the painting "The Pig in the Parlor."

Reading it is like having a conversation with my grandma, who I miss every single day. She called Rix Mills "the Garden of Eden" and passed all of her love for it into my heart.

Oh, to be in Colonial Williamsburg...

So, last week the girls and I (and my mom, who went to drive the van) went to Virginia Beach for the last hoorah. Yes, you read that right. April is coming home NEXT WEEK! I am so excited.

But anyway, we decided that we really wanted to take the girls to Colonial Williamsburg before they moved away. We went there once as children-I was nine, April eight. What I remember-it seemed like Roscoe Village. And it rained.

So, this time, I am sure that I will remember more. And I wanted to impart advice for traveling there with children. Oh, yes, and it rained.

First of all, it is not at all cheap, so I would only advise going if you have children who will truly be interested in seeing it. Otherwise, that is what Roscoe Village is for, and it's nearby. It cost $60 for Betsy and me (Felicity was free, as she is under six, but then, it is not designed for kids under six).

I have nerdy girls, so we decided it was worth it. We read the Felicity book before going, which is set in Williamsburg. Betsy really loved it, as it is about horses.

They recommend that you tour the Governor's Mansion and the Capital Building. We skipped these. Again, base your decision on you kids ages and interest. The tours lasted about 30 minutes for each building, and that was just way too long, especially for Felicity. We did go on our own tour of the Governor's Mansion, which included a stop in the kitchen, where they were making chocolate, and going through the maze in the garden.

We managed to squeeze in all of the shops that were doing demonstrations that day. We met with the blacksmith, the shoemaker, the cabinet maker, and many others. One very interesting note is that they really do make all of their own furniture and buggies and things, using the tools from the time period.

They also have a reinactment that goes on for quite a long time, an hour and forty-five minutes the day that we were there. We watched some of it, and the girls enjoyed it, but then it got talky and they grew bored.

We ate our lunch at one of the taverns and I must say, that was the highlight of the day for me. I had a delicious pulled pork sandwich. They don't advertise it, but the taverns do have a kids menu with cheeseburgers and hot dogs, you just have to ask.

We took the children's orientation tour, which was cute but not much of an orientation. The gentleman leading our tour had the children pick up a bucket to illustrate how heavy carrying water would be, and then he had them go through a scenio of "Good day my lady," and "Good day kind sir." The girls thought that was fun.

They say that they rent costumes, so April and I were very much looking foward to that. However, upon getting there, we discovered that the costume was just a plain white dress, that would go about to their knees, and a bonnet, which you have to buy due to head lice problems. It was disappointing, so we skipped that, and only saw one little girl all day who wore one.

Overall, it was fun. It was too bad that it rained, but it wasn't hot and it wasn't crowded, which I certainly enjoyed.

The next day we went to the beach, which the girls always want to do when we are there. But there are many things to do down there. There is Busch Gardens, and the aquarium, and a small zoo. All things that we have done on other trips. And there is Jamestown and Yorktown if your kids are into the history stuff. The traffic is terrible, especially the closer you get to the beach. April will never remember how she managed to drive in it for all these years.

Anyway, it was a nice last visit. And now I am definately looking forward to visiting them in Akron, where I can go and come home all in one day!